This week my topic is ” Overcoming Grief and Sadness!” Each week I take some questions from my friends on Facebook to answer here in my E-zine.
If you have a spiritual/psychic development question you can leave a message for me here on this page in the comments.
This week I have a Facebook friend who wrote: I can’t let go of my mother’s death. How can I move on?
From MarVeena: Everyone goes through a mourning process in their own way. Usually it takes a year to really digest the pain and experience and get perspective on it. It is a great idea to be gentle with yourself while you are deep in the process.
There are a few things that can help you move through this in a beauty way.
I always do a personal ceremony for that person. I do this with them in mind and helping them into the light. Rather than with my grief in mind. By taking this action and doing some thing to be of service for them, it helps me at the same time. I do this same process for animals that are special to me too!
- First I create a space to hold a few objects to support their journey. A small table in an out of the way place works great. I add some flowers that they liked or that remind me of them, or a green plant. Only living flowers or plants.
- Then I add a stick of incense and a tall “saint candle” They are several that I like, just pick one that resonates to you. Or one that you know was important to them. You can use St Michael, St Francis, Mother Mary, The Virgin of Guadalupe or one for Jesus. You can use a blank candle too. White or another color that feels right.
- Place a photo on the table in a nice frame. This brings their essence to the space. If it is an animal, I will place some of their hair or maybe a dog collar by the picture. For a person If I have a personal item like a watch I might place that close to their picture too.
When I do this ceremony I am alone, I call their spirit to the space if they have been gone more than 3 days. If they have just passed, I don’t call their spirit to me. They are still going through the death journey some times for 3 full days. I like them to totally have their privacy to move through this without my distracting them at all. If the 3 days are passed you can call their spirit into the room.
- Light your candle and incense, ask your own guardian angel to be with you and to help you.
- I start with a song that we call their life song, a piece of music that really represents their journey here. If you know their favorite song, play that.
- Then you just talk to them like they were sitting right there.
- Let them know how much they meant to you while they were here. Talk about the things you learned about your self , life and others through them.
If you don’t feel complete with that person. Meaning you have negative emotions about them or they did something to hurt you …
It helps to do this process and add on a segment where you sort of hash things out. It always behooves you to forgive!! Can’t stress this enough.
If you caused them pain or suffering of any sort. Ask them to forgive you. Speak either out loud or in your mind and tell them where you were in life that might have caused you to act the way you did. You will feel a release if they agree to forgive you.
If you did something really bad and they can’t forgive you, in your mind ask them “how can I make this up to you?”
Observe the thoughts that roll through your mind. Maybe you can do something special in their memory. Or something for one of their family members.
Share your ideas about how they might have been an inspiration to you and others.
Send out blessings in a way that feels right to you. I ask the angels to help me with this.
After all this I either sing or play a Death Song for them. Just think about music that fits them and their journey.
All of these pieces add up, they help you to start to process the pain and deal with it. It all takes time.
I create a memorial area of each of my special pets that cross over. For my horses that cross, I get a big pictures of them to hang on my wall.
If you have something that a loved one used or wore that you can keep close to you, this really is a great way to keep their energy close. Like a watch or ring.
I have several pieces of my grandmothers jewelry, when I miss her I can open up her jewelry box and touch those things. I can feel her spirit and that make me feel good!
It often takes a full year to truly mourn a special loved one. Sometimes more, take what you need. Be aware that they are able to evolve because of this life-death-rebirth process. We all are able to make huge leaps in consciousness. This is the best way for us to refine our souls. We choose these temporary bodies because it allows us different perspectives and experiences.
Keep telling yourself these things to help you feel better about them going on without you. Know in your heart you will get to see them again.
We can’t move forward with our souls dream until we are complete with our past. I teach several ways of doing all of this in my Self Mastery programs. Check out my front page for the next open date if you would like to work with me more!
Please share in the comments below what sort of thought processes helped you get through a tough time.
Bright Blessings!
MarVeena
(c) May 2014